Relationship Rescue


By Meagan Francis  |  

Are you in a relationship rut, having the same fight with your partner over and over again? Or playing the same role—nag, enabler—day in and day out? By contemplating the yamas and niyamas, guidelines for living consciously, you can break free from unhealthy patterns and move toward a more joyful future.

Study Yourself

Although the problems may seem to be all about your partner, if you practice svadhyaya (self-study) you may learn something valuable that can shift the dynamic. For example, do you set your partner up for failure by asking him to do things you know he won’t do—and then play the martyr? If you observe your thoughts and motives, you’ll be less likely to blame.

Love the One You’re With

If you fantasize that the perfect person would solve all your relationship woes, you’re stuck in a cycle of what-ifs. Instead of longing for that elusive and nonexistent perfect partner, contemplate samtosha(contentment); it may help you accept who’s right in front of you. By letting go of fantasies, you allow room for a deeper love.

Reshape Your Future

No relationship thrives without work. That’s where tapas (self-discipline) comes in. Practice this niyama and you’ll be rewarded with a partnership that’s strong and free of regrets.