The Tyranny of Expectations

Opening to possibilities is empowering; falling into expectations is crippling. Recognize the difference and free yourself.

By Phillip Moffitt

You may be surprised when you discover how much choice you have in letting go of expectations. As you have seen, there is nothing to be gained from a mind filled with expectation. But there is much to be gained by living out of your values with real effort and discipline. When you do this, you are showing up for what you value and discovering a sense of joy and ease that is independent of the conditions in your life.

When you practice staying in the "sacred now," the future will take care of itself as well as is possible. My teacher the Venerable Ajahn Sumedho calls this "trusting your practice." It is an acknowledgment that you cannot know the mysteries of how life unfolds or even if a certain outcome that seems desirable would, if it occurred, truly be beneficial. At the same time, it is a declaration that you can attune yourself to that which is loving and benevolent in life. What else would you choose to align yourself with? Do these values not offer the best prospects for any possible future?

I often end a meditation retreat with a poem by the 12th-century Persian poet Hafiz, called "The Sun Never Says."

"Even / After all this time, / The sun never says to the earth, / "You owe Me." / Look at what happens / With a love like that, / It lights the whole sky."

This is the power of giving to life without the burden of expectations.

Phillip Moffitt is a member of the Spirit Rock Teachers' Council in Woodacre, California, and teaches vipassana meditation at Yoga Center of Marin in Corte Madera, California. He leads vipassana meditation retreats nationally, and in 2005 will offer vipassana training for yoga instructors. For more info on Moffitt's retreat schedule, visit www.lifebalance.org

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