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Cultivate Your Connections

Bring classical yoga's lessons off the mat and meditation cushion and into your relationships.

By Judith Lasater

This is the literal translation of "svadhyaya," whose meaning is derived from "sva," or Self (soul, atman, or higher self); "dhy," related to the word "dhyana" which means meditation; and "ya," a suffix that invokes an active quality. Taken as a whole, svadhyaya means "actively meditating on or studying the nature of the Self."

I like to think of this niyama as "remembering to be aware of the true nature of the Self." Svadhyaya is a deep acknowledgment of the oneness of the Self with all that is. When we practice svadhyaya, we begin to dissolve the illusory separation we often feel from our deeper self, from those around us, and from our world.

I remember studying biology in college and being struck by a "new" concept the professors were just beginning to teach: ecology, the idea that all living things were interrelated. For spiritual teachers of all cultures and all eras, this is no new concept. They have always taught an ecology of the spirit, insisting that each of us is connected to each other and to the whole.

In yogic practice, svadhyaya has most traditionally been concerned with the study of yoga scriptures. But in truth any practice that reminds us of our interconnection is svadhyaya. For you, svadhyaya could be studying Patanjali's Sutra, reading this article, practicing asanas, or singing from your heart.

Isvara Pranidhana (Surrendering to God)

Patanjali defines "isvara" as "Lord," and the word "pranidhana" conveys the sense of "throwing down" or "giving up." Thus, isvara pranidhana can be translated as "giving up or surrendering the fruits of all our actions to God."

Many people are confused by this niyama, in part because yoga is seldom presented as a theistic philosophy (even though Patanjali states in the 23rd verse of the Yoga Sutra that devotion to the Lord is one of the main avenues to enlightenment).

In fact, some yoga traditions have interpreted isvara pranidhana as requiring devotion to a particular deity or representation of God, while others have taken "isvara" to refer to a more abstract concept of the divine (much as Twelve Step programs allow participants to define "Higher Power" in their own way).

In either case, the essence of isvara pranidhana is acting as best we can, and then relinquishing all attachment to the outcome of our actions. Only by releasing our fears and hopes for the future can we really be in union with the present moment.

Paradoxically, this surrender requires tremendous strength. To surrender the fruits of our actions to God requires that we give up our egotistical illusion that we know best, and instead accept that the way life unfolds may be part of a pattern too complex to understand. This surrender, however, is anything but passive inactivity. Isvara pranidhana requires not just that we surrender, but also that we act.

Patanjali's teachings demand much of us. He asks us to walk into the unknown, but he does not abandon us. Instead, he offers practices like the niyamas to guide us back home to ourselves—a journey that transforms us and all with whom we come in contact.

Judith Lasater, Ph.D., P.T., author of Relax and Renew (Rodmell, 1995) and Living Your Yoga (Rodmell, 2000) has taught yoga internationally since 1971.

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Reader Comments

ommare

Could it simply be, Bobbie, that this man does not really want to spend time with you? Or that his perception of the relationship is not the same as yours?

Julie

I can understand what stellabloo is saying, since I am at a crossroads where I want to find things that make me happy. But then if I begin the search for happiness, then I may search for the rest of my life, not satisfied with anything nor anyone that may come my way. Meditation will teach us to accept the present moment(s) and the people and things that inhabit such moment. No one or nothing is perfect; actually the word perfect should be banished from language all together.

stellabloo

In reply to Bobbie's dilemna, the hallmarks of the co-dependant relationship are generally an undue focus on the need to fix the problems of another and loss of self-identity to the point where one's feelings of self-worth are inextricably tied to the behaviour of the other.

Isvara Pranidhana is not just a yogic concept; it lies at the core of the 12 Step Program. When we devote ourselves completely to our Higher Power, when we fully trust that we will receive all that we truly need, we open ourselves to relationships with all our fellow beings instead of this dream of the perfect partner.

To concentrate this much mental energy on the one person who is pushing you away is a waste of the Divine Love within you; there are people all around you, including yourself, who can benefit from your love. I'm no psychic, but my thought is that you should walk away and concentrate instead on other things that bring joy and meaning into your life. This is not giving up on the relationship; if it's that easy for you to be thrown "off balance" by another, than think of it as a call to return to Centre.

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