Valentine’s Day is coming up, and if you’re single or stuck in a going-nowhere relationship, you might want to start looking for a date whose profile resembles your own, says Debra Silverman, yogi Seane Corn’s astrologer and the author of The Missing Element: Inspiring Compassion for the Human Condition. “In astrology, opposites attract, but they’re often the harder relationships, because after the ‘honeymoon phase’ is over, differences become irritating,” she explains. “What actually works is when people are similar.” Still not sure whom to pair up with on February 14th? Check out Silverman’s cheat sheet below to find out what you’re really looking for—and what you’re definitely not, even if they remember the flowers and chocolate.
Take Silverman’s quiz: What’s your missing element?
Your Ideal Partner By Zodiac Sign
March 21–April 19
Aries needs a partner who will stand up for themselves and go head-to-head with them, but not somebody who will tell them they’re wrong. They want someone with high energy who offers applause and feedback. They don’t mind having a good fight here and there.
A passive partner who doesn’t get excited or lacks enthusiasm drives Aries nuts.
April 20–May 20
Taurus craves a trustworthy partner who is very stable and reliable, who offers promises, guarantees, and comfort. They also need their partner to make them feel appreciated and needed.
Taurus won’t tolerate disloyalty and inconsistency.
May 21–June 20
Gemini wants a partner who will talk to them, intellectually stimulate them, and fascinate them. They also need someone who will give them lots of space and permission to be themselves.
The worst thing for Gemini is to be told they have to do something, especially if it’s repetitive, predictable, and not intellectual or interesting enough.
June 21–July 22
Cancers look for partners who care about and value their families. How a potential partner gets along with his or her mother is very important to them.
It’s poison for Cancers if their partner doesn’t have respect for the structure and commitment of family; for example, a workaholic who never comes home.
July 23–August 22
Leos need a lot of attention—someone who really appreciates them, celebrates them, and rewards them with positive acknowledgement. They want to be semi-worshipped like a king or a queen.
If Leosdon’t get enough quality time with their partner or their partner doesn’t notice how good they look, that’s poison. Leos need their partners to be physically demonstrative and verbally generous.
August 23–September 22
Virgos desire a partner who is good-looking, but they also need to respect the person for what they do. They love to help their partners, and they need to know there’s something they can provide.
If their partner is too self-sufficient or independent, that’s poison. Virgos also need to be attracted to their partner, and if they’re not, that’s a deal-breaker.
September 23–October 22
Libra needs a partner who is romantic (Hallmark cards were probably invented by a Libra). Libras need to be partnered and they care a lot about making plans together; they hate being alone. They also have a real need to feel you want their advice.
Libras won’t work with omeone really indecisive, unromantic, or disengaged. They have to feel like they are loved and wanted.
October 23–November 21
Scorpios want a partner who understands that they need quiet. They also must have physical contact and sexual responsiveness. Scorpios need to be wanted and needed, but they would never tell you that. They need deep contact, to know you’re really listening to them and to feel really close.
Too much talking, sexual disinterest, or someone too detached or independent won’t work for Scorpios.
November 22–December 21
Sagittarius needs a lot of freedom, permission to travel, and to play independent sports. They love it when their partner wants to go on adventures, take a trip, or study with them. They also like open-minded partners who are interested in what’s going on in the world.
Sagittarius doesn’t want to be confined by a partner. Anyone who is close-minded or strictly regimented won’t do it for them.
December 22–January 19
Capricorns need partners with integrity, somebody devoted to them, who has great respect for their work ethic and also has a high work ethic themselves. They also prefer partners who are fit.
Capricorn can’t take flakes. Steer clear of partners who are irresponsible or lack a strong work ethic.
January 20–February 18
Aquarius needs someone really open-minded and independent who doesn’t want to confine them—they may even be interested in an open relationship.
Aquarian partner pet peeves: traditions, limitations, and being told what to do.
February 19–March 20
Pisces love music, the arts, yoga, meditation, and being able to enjoy these things with a spiritually oriented person is key for them. They are interested in humanitarian work and having a partner who will do that with them. They love to have a purpose in life, be a hero, and to change something.
Someone who is stingy or holding them back, or telling them that they’re weird. Pisces would hate a skeptic or a dogmatic personality who said, ‘You have to do it this way.’ They need permission to be flexible and someone who will change with them. A partner who tries to put them in a box won’t work.
About Our Expert
Debra Silverman believes the quickest path to falling in love with your fate is through learning astrology. Join her online astrology program, Applied Astrology, where you’ll learn what your birth chart has to say about your mind, your purpose, and your destiny. Registration is open now for a limited time—sign up!