Do you see Valentine’s Day as a legit holiday that proves how much your partner does (or doesn’t) love you? Or do you write it off as a tacky, show-offy occasion invented by greeting card companies? Turns out, how you feel about Valentine’s Day — and your love life in general — is influenced by your sign, or more specifically, your “element,” says Debra Silverman, yogi Seane Corn’s astrologer and the author of The Missing Element: Inspiring Compassion for the Human Condition (Findhorn Press, March 15).
“Opposites attract but they don’t get along,” says Silverman. According to The Missing Element, the four elements — water (feminine power, wisdom and silence), air (wonder and consciousness), earth (respect and balance), and fire (conviction) — exist inside all of us and help determine our personalities. The best thing that can happen on Valentine’s Day, and every day, is to have a partner whose “elemental nature” is like yours. But don’t pay too much attention to your zodiac (sun) sign — your actual chart is more nuanced, which would require an astrologer mapping it out for you, Silverman explains. Instead, read the descriptions of the 4 elements below and figure out which one sounds most like you and your partner.
4 Elements, Zodiac Signs + Love
WATER: Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces
“Water signs like feeling safe,” says Silverman. “They like romance; they don’t want over-stimulation. Valentine’s Day for them is a romantic dinner at a quiet place. Water people are more non-verbal — they are more about eating, creating a home, wanting to cuddle. They are introverted and get along with introverts.”
AIR: Gemini, Libra, Aquarius
“Air signs want to include other couples on Valentine’s Day,” says Silverman. “They’ll say, ‘Let’s have a party, go to a friend’s house, see a movie, take a class, go to a restaurant.’ They love being stimulated. Air people love to talk and to socialize with people like them.”
EARTH: Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn
“Earth signs are going to plan out Valentine’s Day in advance,” says Silverman. “They’re going to go online a month ahead and pre-purchase the gift, buy something expensive, and judge you and be mad if you didn’t buy flowers. They measure their love by the outer world, by things. They want to know that you’re practical and considerate [as a romantic partner]. Earth signs like money, structure, being on time, getting things done.”
FIRE: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius
“Fire signs want to be spontaneous,” says Silverman. “They like to dress up and go out dancing, and they want you to tell them how good they look. They like to drink and they like their music on the louder side. The more fun they had, the more they know you love them. Fire signs love to party, change plans, go workout, take a random trip without structure.”
Matchmaking By Element
The next best thing is to having a partner who shares your element is to have a partner whose element is complementary with yours, explains Silverman. For example, water people get along with earth people, and air people love fire people. But what if you’re simply NOT compatible with your partner? If he forgot to bring you flowers or send a card and that’s something you really do care about, the best thing you can do is talk to him about it, says Silverman.
“They’re not trying to hurt you, they’re just being themselves,” she explains. “The more you talk, the more you tell your partner what you want, the quicker you’re going to get it. Rarely does anybody get the partner that matches them. I like to say that Cupid has bad eyesight — he doesn’t look at your chart. You can’t change your partner, but you fell in love with them for a reason. We’re all here to teach each other.”